1. |
||||
2. |
||||
It’s all too much. I’ve been so strong. I’ve bared this weight for too fucking long. I need to get out, I need to escape. It’s like I’m trapped in my own head, lost in my mind deeper and deeper. I want to escape. Get me out. I’m losing grip on myself, I feel I’m fading away. Trapped in my past, I’m fucking losing myself. All I want is to forget everything. I want to get out, I want to separate myself from all of the things I have done, but I cannot sleep, I try to feel - I can’t feel anything. No faith can help, no higher power can fix the pressure caving in my chest. The bottom of the bottle gives me some relief, have another drink so I can feel alive. Waking up with the taste of alcohol and regret lingering behind. I don’t remember how I got here, all I know is I need more. I hate that I love it. I hate that I need it. My wallet is empty and so am I. I’ll do anything to feel alive. My hands are shaking, cold sweat, desperation, and he’s walking alone on these empty streets.
I hate that I love it. I hate that I need it.
|
||||
3. |
||||
I embark all alone, yet I feel your presence
Forget the years of the past
Right now is my only essence
Gaze upon the arid skies, but now I'm stuck to realise
You are half a world away
And there is too much I could say
In this world, we are lost but free
Alone in solitude
This journey lasts forever
We won't ease to ashes
Your pain is minuscule
Thousands suffering everyday
They don't have the basic needs
While you complain and beg for more
She begs for life, whilst you crave for death
Romanticising sorrow is society's weakness
What I see and what I hear
You cannot feel, you cannot touch
Gaze upon oceanic skies, but now I'm stuck to realise
You are half a world away
And there is too much I could say
In this world, we are lost but free
Alone in solitude
This journey lasts forever
we won't ease to ashes
We are lost but free
In the darkest of hours
Perceived months turned into years
The beauty of fate is unpredictable
We won't ease to ashes
Born with natural guidance of the inner voice
I am lost but free
Seeing is to believing
Words from your mouth (Are just a worthless phase)
|
||||
4. |
||||
I have always been there
But never quite in sight
In the back of your mind
Devouring your walls like a fucking parasite
Fear me, do you hear me?
Fear me, do you hear me?
I am death in the form of a man
A whisper in the shadow of a shortened life span
Fed through the lung I step away from the world I know.
God damn.
Fixed solid
You won't break me
I will set my mind to stone
And block out all uncertainty
We are weapons
Our mind's contain the venom
Our mouths the barrel, our tongues the trigger
Out heart the facility of hate.
Our lungs fuel and conduct our actions
We breathe dirt and cloud our judgements
We act on lies dealt by demon deep in cloak
Daggers, cut our throats.
Maniacal, diabolical, scrutiny.
Eyes as black as the ash of the dying sun.
I feel eternal hatred resonate through me
I am but a man, i can feel it pollute the cerebral cortex
Engage.
|
||||
5. |
||||
What is this vision
Am I seeing
The fucking cost of living
The consequences of my choices
My own reality, laid bare before me
The embodiment, of all that is wrong with me
All that is wrong with me
The features are just the same
He's just dead behind the eyes
The visible cost, of my fucking failure to control myself
I've just
I've just internalised
My guilt and the pain I've felt
From caring too much
My worst enemy
My price of living
The cost of failure
Lives inside my head with me
I bear the weight of my sins
I will forever stand alone in this"
|
||||
6. |
Currents - Stillborn
03:42
|
|||
Who the fuck have you become
I don't know who you are anymore
Selfish, a liar, a fake
A person I hate who is bound to his fate
What has happened to my son?
Please tell me, where has he gone?
With the light taken straight from his eyes
This path you have chosen is one I despise
You're not the son that I've raised you to be
You're pathetic and weak
The world isn't yours
It owes you nothing for what you've endured
Can't you see?
You're not the son she wants you to be
You're pathetic and weak
Why can't you see
Why the fuck can't you see?
You're breaking.. your mothers heart
Breaking her heart
You're Breaking her heart
Can't you see you are breaking her fucking heart
If you saw the world through my eyes, you'd feel the constant pain
Ignorance is bliss so keep assuming I have changed
Open your fucking eyes
I am proud of who I am
Why can't you understand?
I hate who you have become
You are not my son
What makes you think I'd believe in you
Everything you do is far from the truth
But I am wrong
I often wonder from the edge of my bed
To the depths of my head
Would I rather be dead
Making friends with cement
Wondering where it went wrong
Fuck everything you said
Can't you see
I am breaking your heart for being alone
I'm breaking your heart for being my own
I'm breaking your heart for being strong
I'm breaking your heart, for being a son
Bastard
Please tell me where have you gone
With the light taken straight from his eyes
This path you have chosen is one I despise
It's cliche to say
That I hope and pray that there will be a day
You'll come back and say, you are proud of the son I became
|
||||
7. |
||||
I'm forever free to be alone
Left wondering, between tall trees
Loving ghosts, in the back of clubs
Behind the light, behind the lights
I warm to way
You will feel in the morning
When i'm awake
Defeating the world
Loving ghosts
Loving ghosts
When i'm awake
I'll be defeating your world
We are the promise of tomorrow
We lack todays grace
Loving ghosts
|
||||
8. |
||||
From the start,
Things can be different
Though we've been down this
Road before.
Nothing is set in stone
Feel free to stray away
Don't let your fragile bones
Keep you down
Now I know
I don't need you now.
You will see the reasons this will,
All seem so familiar
Don't let them get the best of you
Their words sharpened
(Ryan Kirby)
Don't take in what they say
Or you will never be more than the accusations
They made
Life is too short to dwell on the words that meant
Nothing
Throw down in to the dirt
Pick yourself up
Show them who they really are.
You will see the reasons this will,
All seem so familiar
Don't let them get the best of you
Their words
Sharpened,
Just to cut you down
And tear your ambitions apart.
They left me feeling like nothing
mislead and broken down
I refuse to let you overcome.
Pry their eyes wide
Show them who you really are
Never able to define.
(x2)
|
||||
9. |
||||
Don't take me lightly
because i am a force to be reckoned with
ill do what ever it takes
trade my blood for your penance.
I stand before you an empty shell of a man
once the most compassionate of fiends
now the most vile offender
been taken advantage of
Excessively raped by the ones that i love
I lay alone contemplating
the trustees of my wealth
once friends now forgotten
The best years of my life are gone
and nothing to show for it .
Absolutely nothing to show for it
in this moment of melancholy
I choose to indulge I choose to rise above
and seek the opiate
that will erase my pain and make my suffering go away
a vicious cycle gradually catching up to me
destroying any chance i have at a normal existence
You took me lightly
now I am the force that you reckoned with
I did whatever it took
traded my blood for your penance.
Although that part I can bare
spend the rest of my life in the gutter I don't care
watching my peers pass me by
ever progressing without me by there side
it eats me up inside
Then there's me too worn out from
the instant gratification
that has been the bane of my existence
left in ruins by the shadows I called brothers
that's when you know
that that's when life becomes
something you don't wanna be a part of
because you will never escape human nature
For all the years i sacrificed and made myself your bitch
Gave you all my heart and soul pledged until my fucking grave
Now I plea to a false idol to grant to me the strength and malice
of a viper stalking enemies
|
||||
10. |
||||
I am the craftsman,
Of this fragile constellation,
Unambiguous arrangement of light,
There is no escape, there is no exit,
I am bound within the divide.
My hands tied, guilt covers my eyes.
I've become the epitome of all that I despise.
These frail hands enclose broken bottles and dismay,
A manifest of pages so torn and frayed,
Nail me to the cross I built,
Tuck me into the bed I made.
Because I've become the contortion,
Of a violent nature, thesis undefined,
I am the architect,
Of my incongruent design.
And you could be the bird in my poems,
The one who sings so sweetly to me,
To drown out the turbulence,
And rediscover the sanity of sleep.
Awake, I wait,
The shepherd of my thoughts,
I gather the pieces,
To rebuild the fathom of who I am.
I must learn to become the subsequent,
To disperse the narrative of my demons.
And you can be the bird in my poems,
The one who sings so sweetly to me.
I've drowned out the turbulence,
I've found my place of serenity.
I have befriended the entity,
Grown comfortable within the shallow waters,
A knee-high drought to sink the vessel,
To whom I'm no pariah.
This ark contains no walk of life,
And these waters do not part for the purposes of man,
For I have succumbed to the control of my inner most thoughts.
I am prepared to sink with the ship,
And extinguish the fire that fills my lungs,
For this self-inflicted act of self-definition,
Is an act that serves no consequence,
Because within the confine of mortal life,
I am unable to feel,
Bring me your love,
For I wish to sleep in warmth again.
Hold me close,
You're all I know,
Fulfill my heart,
Fulfill my bones.
Hold me close,
And don't let go.
I've found my place of serenity.
I have learned to become the subsequent,
I have rid the constraints of my demons.
I don't know who I am anymore.
|
||||
11. |
Vagrants - Bloodline
03:12
|
|||
I know that I am just an afterthought.
I am tired of beating myself up, because what I do is not enough.
For you, this is all for you, I want to be a better man but there is noone to look to.
I have been doing everything, all for you.
We share a name, but I am not like you.
You don't need me but, God how I needed you.
I am sick of being the burden, even though I know it's not my fault.
I'll be the man, that you never chose to be.
I know that I am just an afterthought
Don't let me waste your time
We share a name, but I am not like you.
You don't need me but, God how I needed you.
|
||||
12. |
Boundaries - Swine
02:47
|
|||
13. |
||||
I’m losing my grip on sanities’ reins
So I despondently drift away, I couldn't care less
Slowing each breath gets harder to breathe
Fighting anxieties’ grasp
To late
I guess we’ll see the best of me
I hear the sounds of my salvation calling but it only fades away
A lonely being
I'm getting questions never answers pushed and pushed until I brake
What will it take?
I'm done with this place never wanted to be here anyway
These passing faces glancing gazes are nightmares to my sleep
I know your just trying to save me sorry but I'm better off alone
I'm not myself here I'm just dying somebody send me home
Somebody send me home!
Passing the time, defining clarity just losing my mind and begging just to be left alone
So as it stands, the walls are closing as the anger expands
So keep pushing on to let the monster be free and I guess we'll see the worst of me!
I despise this world and never asked to be here so back the fuck off just leave me be
Please just give me space to breath I need the headspace but your fucking crowding me
I hear the sounds of my salvation calling but it only fades away
A lonely being
I'm getting questions never answers pushed and pushed until we brake
What will it take?
I'm done with this place never wanted to be here anyway
These passing faces glancing gazes are nightmares to my sleep
I know your just trying to save me sorry but I'm better off alone
I'm not myself here I'm just dying somebody send me home
Just send me home!
|
||||
14. |
||||
15. |
Withered Bones - Guilt
05:41
|
|||
I am a captive held inside this skull.
I would let you in but my head is just too full
Of thoughts and fears that I'm not willing to face.
And it seems that I'm stuck in my head again.
Distance is the sea.
Self-perceptions, the clouds above me.
If I'm floating facedown, it's not where I wanted to be.
Deadweight in confusion drifting further away.
And I'm beginning to think that I care too much.
That this cycle of overthinking is what's killing me.
I'm always overthinking everything.
I will push you away.
I wish you didn't have to leave,
But i always knew that I couldn't stay.
Still trying to forgive.
Still trying to forget.
But I don't want to love
Because the burning flavor lingers on my tongue.
Still tastes like regret.
And I don't know how to let you in.
Distance is the sea.
Self-perceptions, the ball and chain.
If I'm floating facedown, it's not where I wanted to be.
Deadweight in confusion drifting further away.
Those not so distant memories...
They haunt me...
The demons inside me...
They don't let me sleep...
"Let me be." (I lay awake in my bed)
"Won't you just let me be."
The demons inside me...
They don't let me sleep.
I always do this to myself.
I'll be the fire, destroy everything good in my life.
I will always run away.
I don't believe that I deserve this love anymore.
My heart is broken and I'm starting to think.
My mind is an ocean and I'm starting to sink.
|
||||
16. |
||||
(intro)
The weight of the world on my shoulders I heal my heart This is my explanation I wanna stay alive Never again with the ghosts of my past they're my enemies I heal my heart The past is dead and gone I'll hush my heart tonight Redeem me from the ashes I'll make it home I'll make it home Redeem me from the ashes
(verse)
Our words are broken Spiraling downwards Leave this path to self-destruction For there is a lasting future My words are broken
Run, why don't we run Resist this suffering Is this how we face reality It's like a nightmare While I'm wide awake
Refusing to stand down With gritted teeth Refusing to stand down With gritted teeth we brace ourselves
(chorus)
The weight of the world on my shoulders I heal my heart This is my explanation I wanna stay alive Never again with the ghosts of my past they're my enemies I heal my heart The past is dead and gone I'll hush my heart tonight
(verse)
We all have difficulty breathing Suffocating in my burdens Judged as liars, bounded by our deeds Eyes like daggers These lips whisper devastation
Run, why don't we run? Resist this suffering Is this how we face reality It's like a nightmare While I'm wide awake
Run, why don't we run? Resist this suffering Refusing to stand down With gritted teeth we brace ourselves
For heaven's sake, Pray for our hearts Believing in a new hope And a new home
(chorus)
The weight of the world on my shoulders I heal my heart This is my explanation I wanna stay alive Never again with the ghosts of my past they're my enemies I heal my heart The past is dead and gone I'll hush my heart tonight Redeem me from the ashes I'll make it home I'll make it home I'll make it home I'll make it home With these weak hands, My weakened stance I'll take my throne I'll take my throne I'll take my throne I'll take my throne Redeem me from the ashes I'll make it home
(Outro)
Run, why don't you run? Resist this suffering, Refusing to stand down We're saved by grace
|
||||
17. |
||||
You turned the world cold, you opened up this black hole
in my fucking CHEST
This emptiness I wish you could feel it.
So you could know how I feel, every fucking day. Paranoia and loneliness build as my chest starts to cave.
I begin to question all that I am
am I worth anything?
then you changed like the wind, you became everything you said you hated. (Ego trip)
You aren't the person I once knew, your puny fucking brain couldnt grasp what you've put me through.
I've built the thickest fucking walls, stay away from me.
dissapointment
You make me fucking sick.
every night I lay awake, you sleep,
wrapped in your ego filled blanket.
you fucking shallow, piece of shit.
And all you care for is yourself, stuck up, you're the love of your own life.
it's made my hate for you burn brighter than what my love once did
I'd rather kill myself than look you in the eye ever again, I won't extend a hand,
not until hell freezes over, you'll dig your own grave, and lie in it, six feet under
but I don't hope you die I just hope you suffer through a long and lonely life.
fucking suffer
motherfucker
I'm moving on.
|
||||
18. |
||||
Worn out of chasing feelings that will never be mutual
My mind is filled with rage
However I am not a monster
Just a man lost in the wrong age
Why did they save me when I first saw light?
Why did they let me take my first breath?
When I have tried to die
Our oldest memories rise up from childhood
But never before the age of five
What happened during those early days?
From our very first steps
To reaching awareness
Our first memories are from a distant past
But never before five
Possibly we all knew it was a losing battle
Before even seeing light
I started making my own choices
Carved my own path
Despite the overwhelming tide of responsibilities
Why do we even care about these decisions we come to make?
I will not be standing on my feet forever
Feelings will never be true to one another
You’ll never know the day you’ll fail
Becoming a shadow who was never meant to love or to be loved
“Stay gold” was my way of life
In spite of ordeals, obsessions and hangups
But I despise these souvenirs that will forever hold me back
Who said what I am or should be for the first time?
Our oldest memories rise up from childhood
But never before the age of five
What happened during those early days?
From our very first steps to reaching awareness
Our first memories are from a distant past
But never before five
I’ll handle myself alone
|
||||
19. |
||||
Somewhere far below,
A sadness deep inside,
A voice inside my head,
Telling me to let go
Standing in the rain,
Buried in the ground,
I watch myself,
Cry
These black gloves,
Cover my scars,
But they won't stop the bleeding,
Of my heart,
Of my heart
Roses are red,
Tears are blue,
I am sad,
And so are you
Under this bridge,
Water so clear,
Splashes my face,
Consumes me
These black gloves,
Cover our scars,
But they won't stop the bleeding,
Of our hearts
These black gloves,
Cover our scars,
But they won't stop the bleeding,
Of our hearts
Maybe I,
Wanna know,
What it's like,
On the other side,
If I try,
Hold my hand,
Slip away,
With me
|
||||
20. |
Briarcliff - Rogue
03:46
|
|||
Unleash my wrath
My will to live is dead
Rotted out, I feel death reside
Corrupted by this disease that unhinges my mind,
I am extinction,
I am hatred,
I am fear reborn.
In the silence I was awakened.
We live in frailty
The life we reside on weakens,
Stop the spin on this Earth and drown out the sun.
Shit spat from the demons mouth,
Tell me what lies do you offer to sell,
If there is a life after death,
Then my bidding will be due in hell.
What has this world to offer,
When we die alone?
Defiled by the presence that claims my soul.
I felt that hatred as it crept inside,
Crawling up my spine and behind my eyes.
Violent visions consume my mind,
If curiosity kills,
Why can't it kill me?
Burn me from the Earth
Tear out my soul.
I cannot be saved
No where to escape,
When the evil lives in me.
Unhinged by devils bidding,
A man and his mind part,
My being, captured and tortured until torn apart.
Why must I endure this hatred that claims immortality,
The light before my eyes retracts.
Let me claim my death and end insanity.
Too weak to tie the rope,
Withered in my descent,
No one to pity me,
I've seen the end of days,
I am the end of days.
I will be born again,
The craftsmanship of the burning abyss,
I'll suffer a thousand screams,
Oh god, why'd it have to be me?
When will it end.
I am not alive,
I'm dead on the inside.
Drag me to the depths,
I want to be with death.
I am not alive,
I'm dead on the inside
|
||||
21. |
||||
In the middle of a crowd
I stare at the desperation in your eyes
Emptiness surrounding
False hope and repressed issues
I contemplate the boredome infected your will to live
Absorbing substances to change your ways
Get fucked to valorise yourself
Self confidence doesn't grow between your legs
You ignorant harlot
Get on your knees and beg for it
I'll fucking shove the truth down your fucking throat
Like daddy use to do
I will degrade your sorry ass
And you will pretend you fucking love it like you always do
Strip down you whore dont dry your tears and get on your fucking knees
Beg for more and remember you've been warned about guys like me
I will fucking degrade your sorry ass
Drown you into your punishment
I will put you through shame
And you will probably text me back
I will fucking degrade your sorry ass
Drown you into your punishment
I will put you through shame
|
||||
22. |
||||
23. |
||||
24. |
||||
I feel so sick.
I see another silhouette.
They know my name.
I just wish they'd go away.
But they wait.
Why will they wait?
Time is nothing but a perception.
We die, we move on, it's just how we left it.
Life is in death, we learn to accept it.
Go now, you can finally forget me.
I can feel your presence in the room.
I know you know I'm all alone.
Stop hiding show your face to me.
Just take me.
Just take me now.
(Just take me now, I don't belong here anymore)
I'm talking with the shadows now.
They saw they have it figured out.
What's the point in losing sleep?
Just close your eyes and you'll find peace.
This is the end.
|
||||
25. |
||||
This is the cage I'm trapped in
Scratching for light to find the tunnel
Nothing can satiate this hunger
Condemned to a prison I'm forced to rot in
With no crime committed
I am rotting
But for everything I want will I sacrifice the whole
To find the purpose?
To find the entrance?
It is a curse
It is an omen
It is a prison
It is condemnation
I won't be condemned
I will sacrifice it all
I will watch these walls burn
Nothing can stop me
I'll have everything
Feel nothing
Fear nothing
Control
See it
Know it
Feel it
Fear this
You are all condemned
|
||||
26. |
Allegiance - Leaderless
03:38
|
|||
In pursuit of collaborating plots.
To established utmost treachery.
Unnoticed, you twist your knife in my back.
And you bury me.
All I feel is a pull of your lust.
All I smell is the stench of your lies.
Of who you really are.
Who the fuck do you think you are.
Now I know what you're capable of.
Your tactics won't deceived me.
I yearn to see you swallow your own tongue.
For what it's worth.
You. Your presence disgust me.
We are better off this way.
Look at what you've done.
What you've done.
Your petty confession are just a little to late.
Your brotherhood is not my kind of thing.
All I hear is the pulse of my sins.
All I taste is the blood on my hands.
How can I be so blind.
Who the fuck do you think you are.
Look at what you've done.
Mark my words, whatever our ends may be.
I'm through for seacrhing the answer.
I want you to burn.
Fiend. This is not the end.
You will see my face once again. In hell
|
||||
27. |
||||
It's time to let go, and move on from this.
Broken records of the same shit that you play.
It's amazing to see just how far you'll go.
Just to see how I'll react.
Just to see how I'll react.
You'll always get the best of me.
You'll always get the best of me.
Just leave me be.
No sympathy needed for this lost soul. I'm better off alone.
And don't tell me I'll be fine.
(Bens part)
Your face refuses to leave my conscious.
You wear a mask to hide the lies that lie within your being (Your being)
despiteful mindsets, broken promises.
When will this end? When will this fucking end?
Just let this fucking end.
Oh my god here we go again.
Love doesn't belong in your mouth.
And don't test my patients with your so called innocence.
I'm no longer your safe place to rest your heavy head.
This dead weight is taking me back to this empty grave.
But If I guess I'm going I'm taking you with me.
I'm taking you with me.
|
||||
28. |
||||
What will everyone do when you're dead and gone? Nothing. What will everyone say when you're dead and gone? Nothing. Everyone in this world comes to a point in their life when they have to choose between wrong and right. The difference between you and I is I'm never right and you always lie. Mistakes can leave scars but it's up to us if we let them define who we are. It's never been so god damn hard to right these wrongs I've made but with every passing second I'll prove you wrong. Death is a part of life everyone is gonna have to die. When will you stop letting words define who you are? You'll have to learn when to use your mouth and when to shut it.
|
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